I know it's been an extremely long vacation from blogging. Suddenly had the urge to vent my frustration through this outlet. Have been feeling rather melancholic lately. It is really depressing to have to live with someone like her (my aunt). For those of you whom I've mentioned this issue to, you should be in the know of all these but for those who are clueless, just take my aunt as some barbaric lunatic. School hasn't been really pleasant either. For some reason I am unable to perform my usual standards of shooting, not to mention excel in it? I'm also really worried right now because competitions are nearing and with my standard, it'll be such a shame to represent the school because I believe in only achieving the best so my current standard won't do. What is even more ironic is that the more I try to achieve my goal and target for shooting, the worse I perform. Mr Ng is even giving me special training right now to enable me to "let go" and just clear my mind. It seems that only when one does not have anything in mind can one shoot well. Being the goal-driven me, not setting high expectations for myself is probably harder than climbing Mount Everest. haha. Anyway, I'm still trying really hard to let go although it is a difficult feat. Our J2 year seemed to have begun on a wrong beat. Things just didn't feel right or good since the first day of school. Somehow I feel that our class spirit and unity had vanished the moment all of us left our class chalet on 23rd Nov. Now I'm begining to wonder if everything that had taken place last year was just a dream or maybe an illusion. My emotions are suppressing my soul. I'm really on the verge of breaking down due to all the negative factors encompassing me. I sincerely wish and pray that next week would be a really nice one especially on Thursday.