ok, notice that this is the first time i'm using blue font to type my entry? that's because blue represents sadness. this is not the first time i'm typing a sad entry, so i guess this isn't a shock at all. well, i'm not really going into the details because i want to keep this matter as disclosed as possible. then why do i still type this entry you may ask? it's because i want to vent all my frustration by typing it all out and just try to forget about it. frankly, i'm not feeling as exasparated as i was 24 hours ago and surprisingly, i don't really seem angry at all. maybe it is due to all the constant blows that hit me for the past 4 months that i am immune to this as well. certain things are broken and totally beyond repair. i shall only refer to the matter as 'it'. 'it' can never be mended as 'it' is really over now. maybe it is your character that has caused 'it' to turn out this way and i cannot totally fault you, but i'm sorry to say that 'it' is over and even though we try to work 'it' out, 'it' can never be the same again. like broken pieces of a vase, even if the pieces are glued back together, the cracks will still be there. even how highly-skilled you are and try to mend the broken vase, no one can ever change the fact that the "scars" are still there. so, i shall now end my entry by bidding farewell to 'it' which has lasted for 3 years, 4 months and 13 days.